Every so often, a wondrous Internet meme of a non-lexical, nonsense
song becomes earworm. A prime example is Adriano Celentano’s “Prisencolinensinainciusol”,
a gibberish tune that topped the Italian charts in 1972 and has garnered
millions of views on YouTube. That was my nonsensical pop music obsession of
2011. For 2012, there is no better candidate than Russian crooner Eduard Khil’s
“Trololo”.
Initially titled “Я очень рад, ведь я, наконец, возвращаюсь домой”,
the late Khil’s non-lexical Soviet pop sensation gained notoriety when it
became an Internet meme in 2009. The title translated into English means “I Am
Glad, ‘Cause I’m Finally Going Home”. How it came to become known as “Trololo”
was because of the way it sounds. Here’s what the original sounds like:
Note that the song has, at the time of this writing, fifteen
million views to date.
It garnered a minor cult following, including a joke on Family Guy:
There’s even a continuous ten-hour – yes, ten hour
– loop of the song in a single YouTube clip, which you can see here:
It is in fact the only song by Khil available for purchase at
the (non-Russian / Eastern European) iTunes store, where for 99 cents once can
have the pleasure of listening to this musical nonsense nonstop.
We are about six weeks out from the infamous chase for the
Christmas Number One on the UK music charts. Past winners of this title include
vaunted pop classics by Paul McCartney, the Spice Girls, Whitney Houston and
Pink Floyd. For those readers unfamiliar with the concept, this is a cultural
phenomenon in Britain, a time when a mad crush of artists releases
Christmas-themed songs and sing-song-y power ballads in a bid to see who will
end up on top of the musical pile during the biggest sales period in the music
industry for the entire year. Only sales in the week leading immediately up to
Christmas Day counted towards the total, so timing is crucial.
In the last decade, the Christmas Number One single has been
dominated by reality singing competition winners, such as Girls Aloud (who saw “Sound
of the Underground” launch their successful career in 2002), Alexandra Burke
and Leona Lewis. There have on occasion been songs that were released as
explicit cash grabs that have nothing to do with the holiday, such as the
Teletubbies’ theme song and Bob the Builder, some of which top the chart but
often came up just short. Then there was the successful 2009 Facebook-enhanced
campaign to get Rage Against the Machine’s anything-but-Christmas-y “Killing in
the Name” to the top, which was started as a joke to counter the commerciality
of the whole enterprise but actually became the Christmas Number One (I may or
may not have purchased a copy).
There is now a campaign on Facebook to get Eduward Khil’s “Trololo”to the top of the Christmas charts in the UK. Here’s why it should be on top:
True to the whole
enterprise, there’s a huge Novelty Factor. Like comically ironic
candidates like Rage Against the Machine and the insipid Teletubbies theme song
(which was an unconsciously ironic choice), it’s the idea of taking the piss
out of the whole occasion, with its seriousness and sentimentality, that makes
it such a great idea.
It kinda sounds like a Christmas song.
Sing “Trololo lolo” and what does it sound like? “Falalalala”. Reader, the gibberish rhythm makes it, combined with
the instrumentation, almost sound like a forgotten Christmas classic, complete
with orchestral sweep and chimes that make this sound like a Russian Bing
Crosby. Okay maybe not that far, but
it’s a musical facsimile, nyet?
It would be
really, really funny. Having
seen the Christmas Number One parody storyline in Love, Actually many, many times, I have been waiting for a blatant
attempt at the coveted title with a song that mocks the insincere warbling of
pretty young pop stars. Plus, an added bonus would be that the idea of having
this top the chart would make musical executives rip out their hair in
frustration. Can you see Simon Cowell having a fit that a decades-old record
beats out his latest X-Factor
investment, the one that was going to buy him a private island next to Beyoncé’s
and Jay-Z’s?
Universal appeal.
It’s the kind of “universal” record that the record companies try to get to
appeal to everyone with the Christmas Number One releases. While the Spice
Girls had three back-to-back-to-back titles from 1996 to 1998, non-English
speakers would not be able to fully appreciate their singles. “Trololo”,
however, is perfect in that anyone anywhere can sing along and enjoy it. Plus,
it offends absolutely nobody (except aforementioned record company executives)
and language is not a factor. You could play this to anyone of any race, age,
religion, gender, political affiliation, sexual orientation, nationality or
ethnicity and they would get it. I
always wondered: in that old 1972 commercial “I’d Like to Teach the World to
Sing”, what song would the singer
like to teach to sing? It sure isn’t Michael Jackson or “Express Yourself”,
because it’d be too tough with the language barrier. Just throw “Trololo” on
and have everyone sing, and you could bring about world peace. Heck, for those
opposed to pop music as being “too westernized”, let me remind you: this is a pop record from Soviet Russia. (This also explains Eurovision.)
If you can buy “Gangnam Style”, you can buy this
as your next earworm.
Self-explanatory.
So if you’d like to teach the world to sing, have a laugh
and get a perfect score at karaoke while getting caned at your parents’ place, get
“Trololo” to the Christmas Number One! And remember: you can only buy it during
the week leading up to Christmas in the UK, so that the sales count.
With thanks to our friends at Gay French Riviera for the tip!
With thanks to our friends at Gay French Riviera for the tip!